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Posted at 20:21 on 11 Jan 2009 by Pandora / Blake

Tags: D, dominance and submission, Fantasies

I arrived at D's house to find him re-decorating. "What do you think of this as a spanking tool?" he quipped, holding up the long, thin metal plate that had been holding down the carpet at the doorframe. I looked at him. "Er, not at the moment, obviously," he added, hurriedly.

He'd been up a ladder when I arrived, but I begged a hug a little while later as he came out of the bathroom. He burrowed his face affectionately into my neck and his hands dropped almost automatically to cup my bottom. Then he checked himself, and gestured from my waist to my thigh. "Let me guess, you're untouchable from here to here, right?"

"Not totally untouchable, just don't squeeze!"

D, like several of you lot, doesn't really get the whole severity thing. He's more interested in sensation, control, mind-games. He prefers to make me shivering and vulnerable to the lightest of touches, amd then use pain in the subtlest of ways. As a result he doesn't appreciate heavy marking in the way Tom and I do. For me it's a badge of honour: for D it seems injurious, something distasteful and forlorn. I was prepared for him to be a bit freaked out by it, but he surprised me.

"Can I borrow your aloe?" I asked, and knelt up on his bed to apply it myself. I figured he wasn't going to appreciate being asked to do it for me. Afterwards I curled on my side with a contented sigh, glad to be lying down again after an evening helping him with DIY.

"Go on then, let's have a look," he said, in a tone of voice I couldn't quite interpret. I obligingly rolled over for him and he leaned over me, his fingertips lightly brushing my flanks. "Eh, you've had worse," he commented nonchalantly.

"Yes, but I was much younger then, and hadn't started doing this professionally ..." I trailed off; he had bent his head and was dropping the lightest of butterly kisses on every welt.

(As I was writing the above, my phone rang: it was D. "Have you taken your arnica?" he asked. I'd mentioned to him earlier that Amy and Lucy, bless them, had been on my case about forgetting to take it. I assured him I had: it was one of the first things I did when I got home. "Good girl," he said, "I had an alarm set on my phone to remind me to tell you to take it. See how much I love you?"

Yeah. Yeah, I do.)

--

Since yesterday I've been perpetually horny. I keep thinking about spankings. About what it would be like to be spanked, now, to see how much reaction could be triggered by the lightest of taps. The way I feel right now, I'd moan and beg for more. I'm nervous about asking either of my Doms to put me over their knee because I don't know how easy I'd be to damage right now: the last thing I want to come out of this experience with is my first weak spot. And don't worry, I'm not planning to ask for anything high-impact. But hands... I keep thinking (despite my comment to D) about hands on my bum, squeezing and fondling ... I keep thinking of my tender, bruised cheeks being exposed for the most sensual of spankings, every other smack interspersed with gentle caresses. I keep thinking, when else am I going to get the chance to know what that feels like?

I guess this is where you frighten me with warnings about permanent damage, tell me not to be so silly. Maybe I just need to be patient. I don't know though, patience has never been one of my strengths :)

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