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Handprints

Posted at 23:46 on 2 Jan 2012 by Pandora / Blake

Before Christmas, when D and I were still burning the candle at both ends getting Dreams of Spanking ready for launch, we managed to find the time for occasional play. These photos are a reminder of a particularly piquant spanking in which he demonstrated quite how much stronger he is than me, these days:

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Tags: D, hand spanking, kink, Photos

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Audio Q&A: fantasies, crying and polyamory

Posted at 00:51 on 4 Jan 2012 by Pandora / Blake

Tonight I want to try something new: an audio post, inspired by the recent posts of Quai Disciplines (his first audio post answering reader questions, and more recently his "Friday Quai-day" post, which promises to become a series). I really liked the intimacy of this format and decided to take him up on the invitation to answer some of the questions myself, including ones I'd asked him. I decided to do so in audio so as to continue the feeling of a dialogue.

Pandora audio Q & A, Jan 2012 »

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Tags: audio stories, birch, D, Fantasies, Jacq, kink, polyamory, tears, Thomas Cameron

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A victory for sexual freedom

Posted at 23:23 on 6 Jan 2012 by Pandora / Blake

For the past few days I've been watching the development of #ObscenityTrial, a landmark case in which Michael Peacock (AKA Sleazy Michael) was tried for distributing "obscene" DVDs showing gay fisting, watersports, CP and BDSM. Today the jury returned a unanimous verdict of not guilty on all counts. It's been a fascinating case, particularly the live tweets from the courtroom by @ObscenityLawyer, @LexingtonDymock and @NichiHodgson.

Plus there's been all those opportunities for fisting puns. I mean, without first hand experience of the acts depicted it was all quite a lot to take in, so we should give the jury a hand for knuckling down and returning a sensible judgement.

If you've not been following, here's a quick roundup to bring you up to date.

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Tags: BDSM, Extreme porn legislation, in the news, Kink activism, Politics

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First spanking of 2012

Posted at 23:23 on 9 Jan 2012 by Pandora / Blake

This weekend was Paul and Lucy's housewarming party, an epic gathering of kinksters which quickly accounted for my second, third and fourth spankings of 2012. But the first was on Friday night, at home with D.

Before new year we'd indulged our dressing-up hobby and gone halves on a gothic lolita "geisha girl" outfit a friend was selling. This was the first chance I'd had to try it on. It involved rather more fabric than is usual in sexy costumes - the sleeves alone could easily serve as a small tent - but it was nicely fitted on the bodice and short in the skirt. I particularly enjoyed being laced into the sash/waist-cincher, complete with large bow in the small of the back. The result was pleasantly snug, and made me aware of the contours of my body without revealing them.

Unfortunately, I realised the limitations of my new outfit when D instructed me to bend over the foot of the bed. I leaned forward to place my palms on the mattress - and instantly the fabric constricted around my underarms, painfully tight. We hadn't seen much of each other all week and I was feeling a little unsure of myself. Suddenly my self-consciousness bloomed into doubt and insecurity. Was this going to work?

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Tags: D, dominance and submission, kink, strap, tears

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Zoo real girls

Posted at 14:58 on 11 Jan 2012 by Pandora / Blake

A friend sneaked out this page from the Zoo magazine offices to show me. It's a spread from the magazine, over which an editor has stapled tracing paper with scribbled instructions for 'improving' the images. It's like an unholy mashup of the boss' red pen with those reality TV shows in which plastic surgeons draw on women's bodies, highlighting all the places they deviate from the 'ideal' unattainable without surgery or Photoshop.

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Tags: Body positivity, Gender politics, Politics

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Defining feminist porn

Posted at 18:53 on 12 Jan 2012 by Pandora / Blake

A little while ago I wrote an article in which I attempted to define what "fairtrade" porn would look like. There obviously isn't an international standard for fairtrade porn, but perhaps there should be. Production ethics are something I'd love to see more producers publically talking about, especially the ones who are already doing things right.

As a feminist, I'm not only interested in ethical production in general, but also the specific ways in which porn can be compatible with feminist values. (My feminism is post-third wave sex positive trans/queer feminism, which holds no innate incompability with explicit sexual imagery and self-expression.) Not all producers are interested in being feminist, and that's okay: I'm not saying that those studios are unethical. But if you do identify as a feminist, how does that affect the porn you make?

It's not quite as simple as that feminist porn should be woman-positive, while fairtrade porn should be human-positive: it's more that I think feminist porn takes extra care with gender expression, and strives to be explicitly gender egalitarian in its approach. Quizzical Mama has proposed some good guidelines, but they don't leave space for low-budget/homegrown productions, nor for feminists who wish to explore their kinky, violent or nonconsensual fantasies in a progressive way.

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Tags: Fairtrade porn, Female gaze, Gender politics, Politics

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A beginner's guide to spanking

Posted at 00:56 on 17 Jan 2012 by Pandora / Blake

First published in FortheGirls.com erotic e-zine for women.

I was eight when I finally summoned up the courage to confide in my best friend. We'd shared all our secrets except one thing, and it felt like it had haunted me forever. Once I'd decided to do it, my heart wouldn't stop pounding. I leaned over the lunch table and whispered, I want to be spanked.

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Tags: Fantasies, how to, kink, Kink activism, Politics

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Kinky tea party

Posted at 23:51 on 18 Jan 2012 by Pandora / Blake

I found these pictures a while back courtesy of Male Submission Art, and thought they were worth sharing. They're from a Flickr photoset called Kinky Tea Party, a concept gallery by Milo Ampersand that "juxtaposes everyday activities and BDSM scenes in order to comment on society's discomfort/unease with sexuality, particularly kinky sex."

With their elaborate costumes, make-up and drag the tea party guests aren't quite "everyday", but the idea of an intense flogging scene being played out amongst chattering guests, instructed to pay no attention to the players or the photographer, is a startling and powerful one.

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Tags: Gender politics, kink, Kink activism

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A truly epic party

Posted at 01:45 on 22 Jan 2012 by Pandora / Blake

I told you about my first spanking of 2012. The day before, I was lamenting my unspanked state and wondering how long I had to wait. By the end of that weekend, I'd been spanked so many times I lost count.

The occasion was Paul and Lucy's housewarming party, a grand occasion full of kinky friends, familiar faces and new people. Not everyone worth knowing was there, but everyone there was worth knowing. It's a rare scene event where I feel truly comfortable with all the people in the room.

Tom had originally hoped to accompany me, but when he was laid low with a cold I decided I couldn't miss this one - I'd go on my own. I knew that people would be playing, and I was fairly sure I wanted to join in given the opportunity. But I'm not used to going out without a spanker if I want to play, not least because I'm quite picky about who I play with. I was interested in a couple of prospects, but I wasn't sure if it was mutual, if they'd be available, and it's always an effort negotiating this sort of thing without offending anyone you don't want to play with.

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Tags: Adele Haze, Amy Hunter, bruises, cane, Caroline Grey, Finishing School, hand spanking, hand tawsing, Jimmy Holloway, kink, Lucy McLean, Northern Spanking, Paul Kennedy, Photos, switching

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Bring my tea

Posted at 18:26 on 23 Jan 2012 by Pandora / Blake

The other weekend I headed up north to join a small gathering of people celebrating the launch of Nimue's World - the homegrown, boundary-pushing, performer-centric brainchild of Nimue, which launched before mine last year and which I am rapidly starting to think of as Dreams of Spanking's sister site. It was great to catch up with Nims for the first time since our sites launched, and meet her lovely poly family. They'd just come back from shooting with Will and Janna, and I heard all about the scenes they'd filmed as they bounced and decompressed.

I absolutely love the photos from the latest update from that shoot, Bring My Tea. As I know that Nimue and Janna are, like myself, inveterate tea drinkers, there's something inherently amusing about making it the theme of a spanking scene. But the photos are as stylish and elegant as any I've ever seen, to the extent that I had real difficulty choosing which ones to share with you.

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Tags: cane, F-F, hand spanking, Janna, Nimue Allen, Nimues World, riding crop

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Two punishments

Posted at 19:59 on 25 Jan 2012 by Pandora / Blake

You'll remember that I have an ongoing discipline deal with my boyfriends where they help me keep track of my health and fitness goals, and hold me accountable for failures to meet them. You might also have wondered why I haven't written about any punishments in a while. Well, I'm sorry to say that it's not because I've been turning in perfect records every week.

What actually happened was that after I got made homeless last September and moved in with D, the whole thing sort of gently collapsed. Tom wasn't in a position to keep up with things, so between the three of us we agreed that it made sense for D to take over. He was good enough to give me moving week off. Then we tried to pick it up again, but almost immediately I sprained my ankle. And then there was just one thing after another. The more it mounted up, the more reluctant either of us were to confront it. During periods when I was checking in, he was too busy or tired to initiate a big scene. And every week he didn't mention it, the less motivation I had to keep up with my side of the bargain.

During this time it was interesting to see how my habits changed. Despite not being actively engaged in the discipline arrangement, throughout these months D had a positive effect. He doesn't drink, so I pretty much stopped drinking unless I was going out. He also works out nearly every day, and I started going to the gym with him. But I barely did my daily physiotherapy exercises. Yoga, pilates and strength training helped keep my pain at bay, but D and I both knew that I'd need to start doing them if I wanted my condition to improve.

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Tags: bath brush, D, dominance and submission, kink, other pictures, Real life punishment, Triple A Spanking

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Disruption at Upton

Posted at 23:26 on 26 Jan 2012 by Pandora / Blake

The newest update on Sarah Gregory Spanking is a school scene we filmed together last summer. Paul Rogers played her screen father who had just got a job as headmaster of Upton School in England, and he had brought Sarah with him as a student. Not impressed with this state of affairs, she quickly got into trouble picking fights with the other girls, saying England was crappy and America was much better.

Well, that's this girl's story, anyway. She definitely started it :P

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Tags: cane, featured photos, hand spanking, Paul Rogers, Photos, Sarah Gregory, Sarah Gregory Spanking, shoot writeups, wooden paddle

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