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Three Reasons To Become A Patron

Posted at 15:25 on 2 Nov 2020 by eilidh

If you are a patron of my writing and activism, thank you for your support. This post isn't for you. You're welcome to stay and read on, but today I'm talking to non-patrons.
 

Hello, reader who is not a patron! I hope you've enjoyed my public posts. Perhaps you've come here from pandorablake.com, or maybe from my Twitter or a recommendation from a friend. Either way, you're here reading this post and I appreciate it! I'd like to tell you a little bit more about what's going on here on my Patreon. Why do people subscribe, what brings them here, and what keeps them here?
 

1. Be part of something
 

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Tags: activism, Patreon, patron, support, writing

7 comments

5 Ways to Build Trust

Posted at 16:00 on 9 Nov 2020 by Pandora / Blake

As my patrons know, I've just moved house, and am now living in an amazing community with friends. Forming this community has been a powerful experience. It happened surprisingly quickly, from realising during the March lockdown that none of us wanted to live in isolation again, to moving in together at the end of September. In between were five months of weekly Zoom calls, two in-person socially distanced park meets, and some of the richest group work I've ever done. It's transformed the entire way I think about relating. 
 

Several of us have previous experience of attempting to form a community like this, myself included. It turns out that if you want to make it work, you have to do the work - both within yourself, and with the group. We've taken our learnings from our personal experience, from self-development work and our studies into how to form high-functioning relationships, and evolved an organic process which seems to be working really well for us. It's challenging, but so worth it.
 

I've identified five key principles which I think are absolutely essential if you want to build trust and connectedness with people, that will withstand all the difficult things that come up in our lives. In this post I'm going to share them with you, and I hope you find them useful.
 

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Tags: communication, community, power, relationships, trust, vulnerability

9 comments

How the word "kinky" helps tackle BDSM stigma

Posted at 09:50 on 18 Nov 2020 by Pandora / Blake

As I'm revising my manuscript, I'm cutting out the sections that don't quite fit and posting them here. Become a Patron to get access to cut sections about my personal kink, and excerpts from what I'm keeping.

 


The word ‘kinky’ is a useful one. It sounds reassuringly harmless: playful, quirky and unthreatening. It’s my preferred term when I’m discussing my fetishes with people who don’t share them. (We can move on to the question of whether or not we want to reclaim ‘pervert’ later.)
 

I never imagined I’d talk about my kinks outside of my close-knit fetish community - let alone write a book about them. It’s an endless source of surprise to me that I find myself doing this.

 

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Tags: advocacy, BDSM, book, cut section, fetish, freedom of expression, kink, sex, sex positivity, sexual freedom, sexual liberty, sexuality

6 comments

Celebrating 500 Patreon Posts!

Posted at 15:00 on 24 Nov 2020 by Pandora / Blake

It’s hard to believe it, but I now have over 500 on my Patreon! I actually hit this milestone a few weeks ago and in all the chaos of life it passed me by. To be precise, this will be my 512th post to Patreon since I started in April 2016. We’ve been on a rollercoaster of activist causes, legal battles and kinky fun, and I don't intend to stop any time soon. Here’s a highlight reel of some of my favourite moments over the last four years.
 

April 2016 - Did a week of research and sent a ten thousand word response to the Government consultation on age verification - as long as my MPhil thesis!
 

June 2016 - Gave interviews to dozens of publications including The Guardian and The Independent about winning my legal appeal, and Ofcom’s ruling to allow my porn site Dreams of Spanking, to reopen after being criminalised the previous year.
 

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Tags: book, campaigning, media, Patreon, round-up

1 comment

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