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Self-isolation masturbation Monday

Posted at 15:00 on 30 Mar 2020 by Pandora / Blake

We've been self-isolating for a couple of weeks now, and it's important that we to stay connected and support each other. This is a tough time for everyone. It has already had an impact on society and the economy, as you can see from these graphs:

Pornhub Worldwide Traffic Changes graphCoronavirus: The New Economy meme

Since social distancing and self-isolation have kicked in, people have had to be creative about how to spend their time. Social media is full of whimsical self-shot videos showing the many varied ways people have occupied themselves during quarantine. And of course there there has been a notable spike in traffic on porn sites.

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Tags: ethical porn, feminist porn, Masturbation Monday, porn, queer porn

15 comments

Trans visibility

Posted at 11:38 on 28 Mar 2020 by Pandora / Blake

During disasters like this pandemic, artists and writers are more valuable than ever. We need people to document history, process the present, uplift us, and create space for us to work through our emotions about what is happening to the most vulnerable members of our society.

While all this is going on it can be hard to think about anything else. And I will write more about the pandemic and its social context. But I also want to continue writing about the other things that matter to me. The other issues in our society haven't gone away just because something big and new is happening.

People talking about gender affirming healthcare and harm reduction for trans people continue to run into hostility from those who would prefer it if trans folk didn't exist.  A statement of trans solidarity signed by hundreds of feminists was recently undermined by the Guardian, who published it alongside quotes from a couple of transphobic individuals ‘for balance’. The idea of our fundamental right to body and gender autonomy often gets lost, drowned out by misinformation.

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Tags: bodily autonomy, gender, gender politics, genderqueer, non-binary, trans, transgender

6 comments

Pandemic strategies - comparing herd immunity and flattening the curve

Posted at 12:05 on 17 Mar 2020 by Pandora / Blake

This post is about government and individual pandemic strategy, what I'm doing, and what I recommend you do too.

If you're in a country which is still figuring this out Iike the UK or US, I'm hoping to convince you to lay in a month or two's supplies as soon as possible, minimise social contact while doing so, and stay home for 4-8 weeks. Not everone can self-isolate, so if you can, I consider it a civic responsibility to do so.

I planned this post yesterday morning. By the time I got time to write it in the evening, the UK government released more information about the rapidly changing landscape, and my planned post is already out of date. I'm writing this as quickly as I can on my phone. It won't be the exhaustively referenced post I'd planned. 

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Tags: COVID-19, health, pandemic, Patreon, politics, strategy

40 comments

Dreams of Spanking - bent over for the brush

Posted at 10:44 on 4 Mar 2020 by Pandora / Blake

A new Dreams of Spanking photo gallery is up and it’s all about the clothes brush. An exciting implement with a powerful sting. 

Pandora Blake bends over for the wooden hairbrush on Dreams of Spanking

In this fantasy, I know that I’m in for a serious punishment. I’m wearing the tiniest denim shorts, as my disciplinarian enjoys seeing me in skimpy clothes. As I bend over, I eagerly await the feeling of this implement against my skin. I feel the impact of the wooden back of the brush, and the first few strokes are almost pleasurable through the denim. But I am aware of what is to come and my heart is racing.

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Tags: Dreams of Spanking, photos, play, spanking, wooden brush

26 comments

Online privacy and age checks

Posted at 10:11 on 12 Feb 2020 by Pandora / Blake

The ICO have released their new "Age appropriate design", a new statutory code of practice, which aims to keep children safe online in the age of social media. It affects websites likely to be accessed by children in the UK, which will be obliged to account for the "best interests" of the child, and to grant special protection to how childrens' data is used.

Links:

Full code of practice

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Tags: age verification, child safety, ICO, in the news, privacy, young people

43 comments

Rekindling

Posted at 10:28 on 16 Jan 2020 by Pandora / Blake

At 11pm, the baby was finally settled in the cot. I undressed and got into bed. Seeing I was naked rather than in pyjamas, Felix stripped off too. We pressed against each other under the covers. It felt like it had been so long since I'd felt them like this. Their familiar body, from the warm lean tummy nuzzled against mine to the soft fluff on their chest. I'd explored every inch of them time and time again, but lately it seemed like we rarely touched. I breathed them in.

I wanted sex. But... I didn't want it. I felt confused.

I missed my lover. I was dying for some romantic time, just the two of us. I'd recently done childcare while Felix went on a couple of dates with their poly partner, and I yearned to have dates with them too. All our conversations lately had been instrumental. Managing the minutiae of our domestic and family life. We were around each other a lot, but our work from home schedules and taking it in turns to do childcare meant we were more often doing separate things in the same building than truly spending time together. They are the best co-parent. But I missed my lover.

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Tags: Felix, kink, love, punch play, spanking, submission

82 comments

The abuse of the "rough sex" defence

Posted at 13:03 on 5 Dec 2019 by Pandora / Blake

There's been some worrying stories going around about defendants in murder trials trying to get lighter prison sentences by claiming that the murder was just "rough sex gone wrong".

In New Zealand, 21 year old British backpacker Grace Millane was killed while on a Tinder date to celebrate her 22nd birthday. She messaged her friends to say she was having fun, but later that night her date killed her by "pressure to the neck". 

He told jurors it was an accident during consensual kinky sex. But after she was dead, he searched online for ways to dispose of the corpse - and then went straight out on another Tinder date. After Googling for large duffel bags, suitcases and car hire, he later shoved her body in a suitcase and buried it in the forest.

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Tags: BDSM, erotic asphyxiation, in the news, kink acceptance, law, media, violence against women

86 comments

Body love

Posted at 15:00 on 8 Oct 2019 by Pandora / Blake

Pandora Blake post-partum body love

This is me 13 weeks post-partum.

Stretch marks, soft tummy, big boobs, one usually bigger than the other (depending on which one the little one has fed from recently). Strong arms, back and shoulders from carrying my child who is getting bigger by the day.

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Tags: Body positivity, parenthood, photos, post-partum

588 comments

Can has mailing list

Posted at 13:52 on 29 Sep 2019 by Pandora / Blake

Want me to email you more often? I've just set up a mailing list, to make it easier for me to get in touch with you all.

I've been feeling uneasy for a while about my dependence on Twitter to let the world know about my projects. If they pull the rug out from under accounts connected with porn and sex work, I'll lose my biggest broadcast medium in one shot. I decided to take steps to build my resilience. It's high time I hosted my own mailing list. Bonus: you get to hear from me more often!

If you want to be the first to know when I'm back from parental leave and available for spanking sessions again, this is for you.

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Tags: mailing list, sessions

 

Post-partum physicality

Posted at 14:31 on 3 Sep 2019 by Pandora / Blake

My baby arrived in early July, two days early, after a day and a half of labour. They're now eight weeks old, and we're entering the final month of the "fourth trimester". We're both in good health, and words can't express the enormity, joy and transformation of the last two months.

Human babies are born less ready to survive in the world than any other mammals, and their brains are very undeveloped when they're born. If it wasn't for the pesky ratio of pelvis size to head circumference, we'd gestate them until they were ready to move around independently, like calves and puppies can. But as it is, we have this unique experience of a parent/child bond during these first few months where I am, in a very real way, an extension of their body - they physically need me to survive. It's part of the magnitude of the experience that I'm beholden to them 24/7 for sustenance, hydration, ablutions, movement, temperature regulation, and physical closeness. I've been reading various books on parenting and the neuroscience of brain development that emphasise how important cuddles are - and talking, singing, play and other forms of parent/child interaction - for cognitive and social development in early life. Which is good, because I really like cuddles, and snuggling my baby is an indescribably wonderful feeling.

Babywearing - carrying my child around on my front in a sling - has transformed my experience. Being able to hold my baby in a close embrace, rock and soothe them, while freeing up my hands to do other things ({like type this blogpost) is a game changer. I'm currently sitting with my laptop at the kitchen table, bouncing on the yoga ball.

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Tags: body positivity, kink, parenthood, play, post-partum

132 comments

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