Shooting porn generates a lot of data.

For years I bought another cheap external USB hard drive every time my storage filled up. I meant to sort out proper backups, but I never got round to it. I had loads of duplicate data on different drives, I couldn't afford the storage to back it all up without de-duping, and I didn't have time to de-dupe.

You can see where this is going.

Keep reading »

I'm writing this from bed. It's comfy here: I have a pile of pillows my partner affectionately refers to as "pillow mountain". I was meant to have a fluffy blanket, but my cat has claimed it and is kneading it with a kind of orgasmic bliss. I wish I felt that good. 

Bolstered by pillows, it's time for some real talk.

Keep reading »

This year has been one of great transformation. At times it's felt as if my whole life has been thrown into the air, and I've been waiting to see which bits would land. As if all the things tying into my sense of self have been laid out on the table, and are up for examination to see whether they still serve me and whether I want to keep them. It's been a time of great positive change, and a time of loss. Healthy loss - letting go of things I was attached to which weren't working any more - but still, it's added up to a lot of upheaval.

One of the things that's been going on for me this year that I haven't talked about here is my gender.

Keep reading »

"Are those 'ows' real 'ows'?" my top asks in concern, resting the tip of the cane on the bed.

"No. Well, yes, they're real as in it really hurts, but it's the difference between owwww!" (high pitched squeal) "and 'Gerroff, you fucker'." I twist around and look at him through my eyelashes. "Basically if I'm still being cute, I'm consenting."

"Aha." He smiles, and picks up the cane.

Keep reading »