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Rekindling

Posted at 10:28 on 16 Jan 2020 by Pandora / Blake

At 11pm, the baby was finally settled in the cot. I undressed and got into bed. Seeing I was naked rather than in pyjamas, Felix stripped off too. We pressed against each other under the covers. It felt like it had been so long since I'd felt them like this. Their familiar body, from the warm lean tummy nuzzled against mine to the soft fluff on their chest. I'd explored every inch of them time and time again, but lately it seemed like we rarely touched. I breathed them in.

I wanted sex. But... I didn't want it. I felt confused.

I missed my lover. I was dying for some romantic time, just the two of us. I'd recently done childcare while Felix went on a couple of dates with their poly partner, and I yearned to have dates with them too. All our conversations lately had been instrumental. Managing the minutiae of our domestic and family life. We were around each other a lot, but our work from home schedules and taking it in turns to do childcare meant we were more often doing separate things in the same building than truly spending time together. They are the best co-parent. But I missed my lover.

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Tags: Felix, kink, love, punch play, spanking, submission

57 comments

Playing with Faye Summers

Posted at 14:40 on 6 Jul 2019 by Pandora / Blake

It was very strange, packing a bag with toys and BDSM equipment, showering and grooming myself, and preparing to leave the house - for the sake of a session where I was going to be the one paying, rather than the one being paid.

Normally when I'm packing implements to see a client, if I'm going to be receiving, I choose toys that I like. This time, I was explicitly picking the implements I hate. Playing with a trusted friend, I wanted to go deeper than I can when I'm with a client, and explore some of the sensations that make me more afraid. 

In a way, it was relaxing knowing that this appointment was for me. I didn't bother wearing makeup, I threw on comfy clothes, and I didn't have to re-read anyone's emails to refresh my memory about what they wanted. Driving to Faye Summer's apartment just south of the river, my mind was calm. Rather than anticipating the appointment, I enjoyed the sunshine and listened to music, my thoughts clear.

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Tags: anal, BDSM, bondage, breast play, kink, pregnancy, sex in pregnancy, spanking, submission, tawse, wooden paddle

111 comments

The sex worker's sex worker

Posted at 19:22 on 25 Jun 2019 by Pandora / Blake

A few weeks ago I sent a nerve-wracking email.

For a few years now, I've been thinking about hiring a sex worker. I've been inspired by the wonderful women and queer folx who have booked me for sessions: our culture makes it a lot easier for men to honour their sexual needs and seek out ways of getting them met than people of other genders, particularly people who have experienced misogyny and slut-shaming. I really admire it when a woman or non-binary person comes to me, knowing what they want, and with enough self-esteem to think they deserve to get it. It made me wonder if this would be something I might do for myself one day.

The problem, as I saw it, was that as a sex worker myself, all of the suitable candidates I could think of - who I knew I could trust with my body and my fantasies - were friends and colleagues. Some of them friends I hadn't dated, some of them friends I had. Part of the professionalism of sex work, for me, is to maintain distinct boundaries between my clients and my social life, in order to manage everyone's expectations and make sure I'm not giving too much. So it seemed the idea was a non-starter - even though I felt like it might be a really cool experience to be on the other side for once.

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Tags: boundaries, kink, sex work, submission

77 comments

Interview about feminism and submission at ErikaLust.com

Posted at 11:00 on 4 Mar 2017 by Pandora / Blake

I recently gave an interview to fellow feminist porn producer, the fabulous Erika Lust, which is now available on her website, complete with some pictures and sexy gifs! We talked about how I make my porn ethical; how Dreams of Spanking is at risk from the Digital Economy Bill here in the UK; how many of the fetish acts which seem to have been highlighted as “unacceptable” are those specific to female domination porn; feminism and submission; BDSM in the mainstream, and more. It had to be cut for length, but just for you dear readers here is the interview in full:

Dominance and submission at ethical porn site Dreams of Spanking

Hi Pandora! It's so great to talk to a woman on the same mission as myself to change the face of porn, *virtual high five* :) Now down to business. Your work has been described as "ethically produced fetish content" on your site Dreams of Spanking. Can you explain a little what this means?

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Tags: censorship, Digital Economy Bill, Dreams of Spanking, ethical porn, feminism, feminist porn, kink activism, stigma, submission

 

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